It's my birthday and I'll buy if I want to

So it's my flat mates birthday and I haven't bought her anything. I have decided not to buy anything in lent, so cannot go shopping. I did not buy anything before lent in readiness. To be honest my shopping was a bit random before lent. I went into Oxfam to buy a wardrobe, I saw one for £19.99 and then saw that for just another £6.01 I could buy a ....er..... sledge.

Which turned out to be rubbish for hanging clothes but quite good for chitting potatoes.

So I make her a card out of an old ladybird book with a funny caption.

Then I wrap up a book which I found being thrown out at work called 650 Favourite Recipes by the Womens Institue. My girlfriend is coming round for the evening before my flatmate's birthday so I declare this 'Kate's pre-birthday event'

We spend the evening reading out the recipes which seem to consist of long forgotten 1970's ingredients such as 'canned chopped pork'. We decide to have another evening where we make a whole meal from the book and the winner is the one who doesn't throw up.

We then watch a Sarah Millican DVD borrowed from a friend. We laugh a lot and Jo is glad she did not watch it with her children.

We then tell each other funny stories and all secretly decide we could be stand up comedians.